Making Judgements

Making Judgements

Man is habituated for making judgements on others. He loves jumping to conclusions even though he has absolutely no idea of the truth about the other person.

We love to arrive at our biased conclusions even before we have gathered enough facts about another human being. I am reminded of an ad which appeared for some phone company where the woman is speaking at a nearby table holding her hand near her ear. At another table an older gentleman who looks at her thinks that she is talking to him. In fact she was talking into her phone which was a very tiny instrument cupped in her hand. Here the gentleman who thought that she was talking to him, is like us who don’t know the entire facts and just think what our little mind exaggerates to us.

Imagine someone whom you don’t like from the bottom of your heart is about to say something and you suddenly interject and cut him off dissing him right at start. Wouldn’t you like to know what he was going to speak? No! You never even allowed him to speak up. You immediately jumped the gun and destroyed the scene. This happens for multiple reasons. One of them is our previous experience with the said individual. We assume he will do the same thing as he did before. Second one is our internal biases. We hate certain things and people, say for example, people who wear black, religious folks, dark skinned, opposition parties, political folks, physically or mentally challenged ones, classic relatives, siblings, etc, etc.. Here the term hate is a strongly biased one and man surely has very strong biases.

We have to learn to control our constantly jumping mind. Can you not take in the other persons views completely before you start your conclusions? So first you gotta listen very patiently to what he speaks. Don’t interject and put your leg in the middle. Shut your mind and your mouth and get the entire story first before arriving at conclusions. Silly and stupid arguments happen only because we do not allow the other person to complete his say. We love taking a biased stand.

Look at a nation called USA and you will know what I am talking about. The media and people are bashing the newly elected president even before he has taken charge. It is important to first allow the man to speak and do his job and not criticize even before he has done anything at all. How can anyone prejudge another person? Don’t you remember the clip of Jesse Owens winning gold at Berlin Olympics? Also, remember the derogatory cover of a magazine showing a beggar sitting on nukes holding a begging bowl, depicting India is such poor light when India became the nuclear power?

Today, if you look at the above two examples you will realize that a colored man is the fastest individual and India is fast becoming one of the richest nations. Still man was doing what he is best at. Deriding others even before he has all the facts in hand. This happens so often in the talent shows too. The judges judge a person even before he had performed by looking at appearances.

In spiritual, man is supposed to shut up and listen to everything that the Master teaches. This is called silencing the mind. Listening is the most important part of sadhana or practices. Silence is integral part of spirituality. So is listening. In spiritual man learns to overcome his mind by making it silent. Yogis sit in meditative state for a very long time. Meditation is the key to spirituality and learning to silence the mouth and the mind is surely the key to progressing in that world.

A true spiritual being is never judgmental. He is supposed to never give opinions or take sides. He has to be neutral and understanding. He learns empathy and knows that no one is right or wrong. Spiritual teaches one not to be judgmental. Everyone and everything is a portion of the divine. Each of us are performing a role as written by The Lord. Even villains like Ravana or Shishupal were enacting a part in the drama of life. They were ordained to do those roles by The Lord Himself. So whom can the spiritual ones judge on?

As a concluding note I will urge every spiritual person to not judge another human being before hearing the complete story from the other side. Know that everything is perfect in its place. Without the villain there can never be a hero. They both complement each other and have their perfect places. So stop judging and become silent and peaceful.

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Mind Chatter

man-909049_1280How to stop mind chatter? Is there any way to do that, dear God?

There are various methods prescribed by different people. Which one would you like to know?

Tell me the simplest and easiest.

Why are you so keen to stop your mind talk? Doesn’t it serve you well? You think all the impossible things you know.

You read minds so you know that very well. Tell me what I am thinking right now?

Ha ha, that’s so easy to guess. You don’t need to be God to know what you are thinking. You are wondering now that I am not going to answer your question, instead I will give you some roundabout explanation which you will never understand. Right?

You are absolutely right. If only man understands what you say to him, he will be better off. But man never listens to you. He listens to his own mind.

Absolutely right. Man never listens to me at all. I am that voice inside of you which talks first to you but you drown my voice out with your minds chatter.

Which is why I was asking you how to stop that from happening? We think, think and think so much that our brains are about to fall out.

Yes. Right at the back of first thought is the second, then third and fourth and so on. It becomes a deluge soon enough.

That is right. So how can we stop this overflow of thoughts?

There is distraction, activity, inactivity, sleep, drugs, drinks, entanglements and so many other methods. Which one do you want?

Oh, wow! Tell me all.

In one Mel Brooks film, he asks the patient where it hurts and the patient shows his legs, Mel takes a stick and whacks his head. So the patient starts chasing Mel. Mel then tells him, look your hurt in leg is gone since you are chasing me. Now it hurts in your head. This is called distraction. Got it?

You watch films, God? That was funny.

What? Mel or me? Anyway the next method is to get so busy in some activity that you stop thinking entirely.

Can you tell me some examples here?

Get yourself a hobby or get involved in social service or some such work. It will keep you busy and you won’t have time to dwell on your past.

Inactivity must be connected to meditation? Or does it mean we just vegetate?

Inactivity means you could just be sitting near a lake or go to a garden to gaze at nature. It makes your mind tranquil and calm. Especially the green nature.

Of course, sleep could make your mind cease to think or dwell on any subject.

Right. But drugs and drinks are terrible methods of ceasing the mind to think. Mind numbing drugs are very potent and one should not indulge in them. So also is alcohol and other intoxicating stuff. It could lead to dangerous addiction. Stay away from these things.

You said entanglements. What does that mean?

When you are in love with someone, you cannot see anyone else. You only are lost in that person. All love stories tell you that. Even marriage can put you out of your own mind problems but marriage or affairs could start another headache for you.

God, these things I know very well. Tell me something new. You should enlighten me in things I don’t know.

What? Isn’t it enough for starters? Go and apply one of these solutions first and tell me how you fare.

But you never revealed anything new to me. What crap is that? Tell me something else. I have used all of the above and never succeeded in anything at all. Give me more.

No use giving you anymore. First you should focus on one and see for yourself. By the way, the love of your life is calling out to you. You have to drop your kids to school. Get up now!

Yawn! Why should I get up now? Tell me more. Tell me.

Wife: whom were you talking to in sleep? You get up and get ready fast, the kids are getting late to school!!!

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Don’t Teach Me!

teach meDon’t teach me! I know what is right! Whenever you ask someone to do something, that person usually doesn’t perform the said task in the specified manner. Especially if it is related to marriage, teaching, life decisions, etc.. I shall elaborate here the examples.
You tell your child that for his future growth and development he needs to do a certain course, but he doesn’t listen to you. He follows all his friends and joins something that has no value. With the wisdom and foresight given to you by your years of experience, you had advised him on his life path. But he doesn’t listen to you and does exactly as he wishes. Thereby falling into the trap set by destiny. Much later he realizes and repents on that.
Now a young girl is advised not to get into a certain relationship but she disses you and falls exactly into that relationship. Much later she realizes the futility of it all and repents. You had told her about the pitfalls right at the onset but she didn’t care to listen. You were talking about it since you had already burnt your hand earlier in life. But no one learns from your misfortunes. The girl believes that she will have the most perfect relationship and considers herself an exception to the rule. But years of knowledge has taught you that everything works in the same manner. What is the use of crying over spilt milk?
Now you are a teacher of repute and full of knowledge. You meet many students who teach you how to teach. They believe your methods are old fashioned or not suitable for them. With the little years of studies they believe they have earth shattering solutions. They wish to advise you on every little thing. Once they graduate they remember years later how your teachings were perfect.
Every penny saved is a penny earned. You have learnt it the hard way. There are no windfalls and if there are then money vanishes the way quickly too. So putting together one at a time is studied by you. But everyone falls for the fly by night operators or get rich quick schemes. They invest in the pyramid schemes and other such con games. Burning their fingers and becoming poor, they destroy their lives.
So why does the man never listen to the voice of reason? He believes he will be that one to win the jackpot, land the best or highly paid job, get the best girl or boy, have a perfect story book romance, have a happily married life, get old steadily and have retirement benefits, enjoy his holidays or vacations, have ample money to go on for the next ten generations, get all documents perfectly done, government permissions, etc…. But the reverse happens.
Human ego is the most difficult to put down or control. It constantly tells you that you are the best or the worst. No in-between for you. You are not a common person. You are capable of taking your own decisions. You have a mind which reason out with you, feeding you that you are the worlds greatest and the best. The words falls out from your mouth with the first person singular letter right at the beginning. I know. I am capable. I am the best. Don’t teach me. I know what is good for me.
We teach in spiritual to tame the ego and subdue the mind. The Guru puts you through a rigorous training of taming that ego. You do the sadhana of overcoming the mind, senses and body.Surrender to the Guru is the toughest thing in the world. There too, you will say- I know. But you don’t have the will to do so. Your ‘I’ fails. You can never be the best in the eye of the Guru till you conquer your ego and mind. You have to decimate your big fat ego in front of Him. So hardly any can survive the teachings
There will always be the I to control, who controls you. You are nobody in front of your ego. To be the best disciple of the Guru requires tremendous submission and surrender. To be the tool in His hands is the highest learning. So leave your arrogance and ego outside when you enter the portals of your Guru’s ashraya. These are the two slippers. Then strip yourself of the clothes which means you don’t have any qualms for submission. No fear or shame to bow down to Him. Destroy the false ego by the death rites or tarpana. Have a bath by removing traces of your past tendencies. Put on new garments of a new life. Get a new identity. Go forth in the world as the Guruputra.
So how many of you think can leave your ego outside? If you cannot then don’t complain when your son or daughter doesn’t listen to you. Don’t complain when you have a miserable spouse who always treats you like crap. Don’t complain when you don’t have money or future. You know you are your own worst enemy when you don’t listen to the voice of reason. So stop expecting others to listen to you.

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No One Listens!

no one listens

Why don’t they listen? You keep on telling them and still they never listen. It’s no use talking you say, because any which way no one will listen. So why talk and waste your breath?
Yours is a sage’s advice and still no one takes it. You know that you have gone through similar situations and made mistakes. So you don’t want the others to do the same. So out of your goodness, you want these people not to repeat your type of mistakes. It has been costly mistakes and you have been suffering because of them. So you don’t want these folks to err, so you want to help them. But no one wants to do that. Their big fat ego comes in the way and they never for once listen to your sagacious advice.
After they did that several times, you have stopped telling them anything. They don’t care for you and neither do you give a damn if they are alive or not. You feel sad for them so many times that you go and open your mouth to genuinely stop them and again commit the grand blunder. Don’t you?
Do you see you don’t listen to your own advice too. You keep on doling advice when you have vowed never to advise again. It’s a sheer waste of time.
So now think about it. If you never follow your own advice, why do you expect someone else to listen to you? Silly! Isn’t it?
But your human nature is never to learn. Of course, you know you have made a mistake but do you learn? Does anybody ever learn?
I know of a woman who got married with stars in her eyes but soon they became bleak and dimmed out. She took a divorce but even before the ink on the divorce papers was dry she fell in another dreamy relationship. How long does it take to become a nightmare? She was chugging along one day and the next day she had a breakdown. She goes around telling everyone how bad her marriage was and that no one should ever get married. The irony of it all is that she has again fallen into another love trap.
Once you took a loan and got into deep trouble. You tried getting out of it so you went and borrowed again. You went into a bigger hellhole. Once out of it, you vowed never to take another loan. But you again took another big loan and now you tell everyone how bad is your life.
Both these great folks advise you not to fall into similar traps. But they themselves cannot extricate out of it. So what good is their advice? Tell me!
So doesn’t it tell you that man never learns. Look at gamblers or drunkards. They promise never to do that again and they fall into it again and again. The drug addicts can never leave their habit.
I still remember Robin Williams in so many movies giving advice as the main character about life and how to live it with dignity. Yet, when his time came, he took the easy way out. He could never take his own advice. So what about others?
In spiritual, we train so many disciples and yet there is either a single person or none who will ever listen to the Guru. Remember, the teacher or the Guru has been given the duty or job of being one. It’s their profession or calling. They keep on giving knowledge but how many actually take it? Hardly any!
To find a perfect devotee or disciple is the biggest manhunt. To find one like Shree Ram or Krsna is impossible. To find another Parshuram is still tough.
Even Peter didn’t listen to Jesus. Neither did Devadatta listen to Buddha. Hriday had the penchant to disregard Ramakrishnaji.
So what use is teaching or telling someone something that could change that person? So do we stop doing that?
No way. That which has to be done has to be done. Whether someone listens to them or not. If it’s your duty to do that then you better excel in your duty. As a teacher, you got to explain and do it over and over again. Whether the person understands in the first attempt or maybe it takes numerous attempts, it’s the c and the teacher who is true to her calling, to be benevolent, compassionate, kind and patient with the disciples or students. So even if someone wants to listen or not, it’s our duty to caution that other.
On the part of the disciple or student, it’s his or her duty to listen to their teacher and do what is righteous. It’s important to be attentive and become a good listener.
Any which way, both the teacher and the taught have to do their respective duties and be true to their own calling also. So pay attention!

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Get A Stupid Answer!

Ask a stupid question and get a stupid answer. Ask an intelligent question and so do we get an intelligent answer? No way! It’s still a stupid answer!
Ask anyone this question- do you know the story of Cinderella? The answer is—? First they will want to know why you are asking that question? Next they will think that you are asking a trick question and will think up the most stupid answer. Thereafter they will ask you if that is what you meant?
The answer to the question is- YES! Yet, did you notice how the answers came? They could be the weirdest ones too.
So doesn’t it tell you that no one actually listens to another but listens more to their own mind? Everyone has this disability of not listening at all. The question is not a trick one, yet why does the mind think otherwise?
So once these great intelligent folks come up with the stupidest answer, ask them the next question. Ask them- can you tell me the story of Cinderella in four or five lines? Then see the amount of time they take to tell you that. It’s all about confusion and absolute chaos in their minds. They cannot even tell you a simple story straight up.
So you see it’s not about confusion or mind processing but about paying attention to anything. These folks do not have focus in their lives too. Always meandering and getting lost. But the same person is so focused in greed and lust. They know what they want. They are sure about the outcomes. They can be the most devious and can plot the game plan perfectly.
So why do we always come across like this? Is it that the mind cannot process simpler stuff simply? Or is the mind getting more convoluted and tricky as we learn more and more of the worldly stuff? You will find that the greatest authors, scientists or artists cannot perform the simplest of the acts. It reminds me of a story of a Nobel prize winner. He stood in a queue and when his turn came, he couldn’t even remember why he was there or what his name was. Thus this man proves to us that we cannot process simple stuff in our minds as we become more and more educated or knowledgeable in life. So as we move into the more rarified atmosphere of life we tend to become more confused.
So it’s important to be simple, live simply, do simple stuff, work in minimalism, not get complicated and live in the here and the now.
The more complicated words that the person uses, they loose more audience. If you want the common man to know what you are saying, then come down to their level of understanding. Explain stuff to anyone simply like you would to a small kid.
Now know this- it’s the most difficult thing in the world to do that!!! To tell it simply!

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I Don’t Need Saving!

I don’t need saving. I can tell you who is the best candidate for your generosity and contribution. They deserve your benefit and patronage the most.
Every human being thinks about someone else when it comes to some issues which need correction or addressing. They feel that they are content, fulfilled, have alls, non deserving, full up, complete, infallible, uncorrupted and that there is someone else who is lacking in it.
Once the sage was explaining the next weeks programmed of self empowerment to his disciples and one of them said that it’s the right program for his wife and that he will enroll her for that. The sage looked up and said that it’s not for her but for his dear disciple who needs it the most. If it was meant for his wife then she would have heard it first but since it was told to that group so it was meant for them alone.
So now you get it. If you are reading this article then it was meant for you to receive it alone and not those who don’t read it. You need correction or direction more than any other person. So you can please stay on and listen.
What comes to you naturally is the way of the universe to provide you with the answers. It is bringing up to your doorstep that which is essential.
Now you may say then why do I have to struggle for other stuff so much? I work my ass off for getting what I deserve and still the fruit is elusive.
Then my answer is that the universe does not think you need it but using your own will you are working towards it. That’s drawing newer karma. If it’s destined, then it comes on its own but when you work hard to get it then it’s newer karma creation.
I know this may not give you full understanding. So let’s leave it at that. What you deserve to know is what you will get to know. Right? What says?

All Hear, No One Listens!

Trust people to do what you ask them to the first time you tell them anything and they won’t do. So don’t throw your faith on untrustworthy people, they are bound to destroy it. Keep faith in yourself that some day, they might listen to you. Listening is more deeper than hearing. All hear, hardly anyone listens!

Don’t Shut The Truth Out!

Your truth is your truth alone and it is my falsehood. Your goodness is your measure of goodness and not my idea of goodness. The mother forces the child to drink a health drink and the child revolts because she wants to drink coffee just like the elders do. The child feels that her mother is forcing down that drink which is not as tasty as coffee just because she hates her. But the truth is the mother wants her child to be healthy and the child thinks otherwise.
We act just like this in our lives all the time. We believe those who force us to do some stuff are our enemies and our ego revolts into opposing that same act. We say that if you were to tell me nicely, I would drink even poison from your hands. But that again is not the truth because we are the thinking kind of humans. We believe anything done by our loved ones is good and not by some outsiders. We do not believe the world outside our limited vision is good.
Yesterday I overheard a very young girl asking her mother on phone, directions in the bus from the airport. The mother was in Mumbai and the girl was traveling in Bangalore. I offered to tell her the stop but she gave me a very suspicious look and asked the conductor. Finally, I guided her as her destination approached. But the idea that her mom and the authority is perfect made her look at me suspiciously. In the end, I worked out the correct point of exit.
So we qualify truth only to suit our own personal tastes and hence we need to keep an open mind. Listen and take everything with an unbiased approach. Listening is a great art. So listen carefully but decide for yourself alone. Your truth is yours alone. But don’t discount another till you test it. Don’t close your mind but keep all options open. You should keep the mind open for God to work His magic in you. You don’t know in what shape God appears to you. So listen and allow magic to happen to you.

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